Te kōrero o Robert , Robert Hita's story
Robert Hita talks about how important it is for him to help his wife with her heart disease. Important for them to work together, and for him to support her in managing her own illness. He also talks about his motivation to stop smoking; which was his daughter. And finally he talks about is their use of rongoā (kawakawa and koromiko).
Robert, can you give us a little bit of background and how come you're here at the Tāne Ora Conference?
My involvement in the health started back in the early 1992. I was working again for a Māori provider that was based in Pukekohe, and it still is, and the name of that one is Working and Development Trust. And I started there as a Rangatahi Kaimahi working with at risk rangatahi, and just teaching them basic life skills.
From there, I got into health promotions, and I done a course at AUT in Manukau. And that gave me, I suppose you could call it a licence, or the right to go on to all the maraes within Te Puaha o Waikato, which is in the Northern Waikato area, outside of Pukekohe, Tuakau. And I got to meet a lot of marae whānau, so much that they actually thought I was from Waikato. And so I made good friendships, good relationships there with the local whānau, marae whānau, and then from there, it was about that time that I quit smoking.
Tell us about that, because you told me last night, when we were just having a chat informally, about what the trigger was, this visual image I have of your daughter when you walked in the room.
Yes, well prior to that actually I had actually given up three times prior to that, and the longest was in 1984, and I was auahi kore for two years, and then my tuahine, my sister passed away, and then as we do, we all come together, as you do and it was actually at her tangi that I picked it up again. And then I started back, it was about 18 months before I packed it back up again. And then in 1989 our kōtiro was born, and from there I was a very heavy smoker. I never smoked tobacco, I always smoked tailor mades, you know and even though I couldn't afford them you make sure, you make sure as a smoker it’s a priority.
It’s very much priority before a lot of other things. As a smoker, yes smokes came first for me, I smoked in my house, I smoked everywhere: I smoked in the car, I smoked in front of my kōtiro. And then I think it she would have been about 6 or 7, and we were sitting in the sitting room one day and I was watching TV, and she came in with one of these lolly cigarettes, and she sat straight opposite me and she started puffing on this thing with her legs folded like how I do when I'm relaxing having a cigarette. And that really, really bothered me to see that, because I didn't want her to pick up the smoking habit and so from there I gave myself four weeks, four weeks to quit, I put a date on the calendar.
Set a goal?
Set a goal to stop and I didn't even slow down. Those whole four weeks, I didn't reduce or anything like, it just came the day and then I stopped. But one thing I did though was that I went out and bought me a packet of Benson and Hedges. I bought me a lighter, and I unwrapped it, took it all out, and I put it in the drawer and said if I can't do this, I don't want to be looking for a cigarette. I want to get straight back into it. So that was my back up plan, I never thought about what sort of back up plan that was. But anyway I was successful, I ended up giving that packet of cigarettes away.
What made you successful?
I think it was my, really I didn't really want my kōtiro, cause me and my wife have only got one child.
She's pretty precious isn't she?
Very much so, very much so, and yeah so that was the main motivation from me to have her grow up auahi kore.
Tell me about your wife, I think maybe... was it 8 years ago she was diagnosed with heart disease?
Yep, it was about six and a half years ago, and that was a huge shock to us because we didn't think that anything like that would happen to us, as we do. When we found out about it, it was a real concern because we didn't know nothing about it. And so we were seeking advice, so we went to the doctors, because we’re, at that time I was employed with an organisation called Raukura Hauora o Tainui and they have their own clinics.
One of the things, I suppose is the perks of the mahi was that all claim mahi and their immediate family can access doctors with out any fees. And its free. So she went there to have a check up and sure enough, so they put her in this programme that was run out of Middlemore Hospital.
So she had to go to Middlemore initially and then someone from Middlemore used to visit at your whare?
Yeah, initially she went in there to get assessment, and they had a bit of a kōrero and gave her some information around what the programme was. And she actually went up there twice to do that. And then one of the biggest problems for her was actually getting there, because getting there from Pukekohe, where we live, to Middlemore was quite a way.
So what they offered her was that they would come and visit her in the home.It was great because when you're in your own environment, in your own whare, you can open up a bit more.
How long did that sort of service happen when this person came to your whare?
It was for 18 months, that was just initially to get Milly, that's my wife, to make sure she understood the processes around it. And the type of support that they offered. It was really great, and I think the biggest thing for her was around them visiting her at home.
What types of support did they offer when they were coming and talking?
Well the biggest one as I said was medication, regular checks, and of course the big one was home visits.
So they would actually explain the pills to your wife, what they each were for?
What they were for, how to use them, you know and the timing around how many you take.
In the time that your wife's been taking the pills have any of the pills changed in terms of some have some gone off the market and she's had to replace with new ones, or has she been consistent with the same looking, same coloured pills all that time?
I'm not sure, because she had quite a bit of a variety of pills, a range of pills that she took, and I don't really know how she managed to manage that herself. What they did do was they put it into blister packs
She was taking about three or four different pills. So what they done is they all put it in blister packs where it like, how would you explain a blister pack?
Its not allocated per day so she knows what to take on Monday.
Yeah, and it was, it was and it also allocated for during the day as well as individual days.
So timing was quite crucial was it?
It was timing, and of course the days. And that was helpful because then she didn't have to go through all these different bottles or different variety of pills: it was like a bulk package of pills that she was taking regularly.
How have you managed to support her in practical ways for her to come to terms with her illness?
I think my main role of support was actually changing my way. And that was quite a bit of a challenge to start with. We used to be quite social, and we used to go out quite regularly, so that changed quite a bit. Then the other one was around physical activity. I'm not a good swimmer, but that was the one that she liked the best, so once a week we would go for a swim. We would travel out to Papakura because it had the warm pools.
And the other thing was also around our eating habits, that was a huge change. That was really challenging because our diet wasn't the best. So that was I think for me was a major challenge. But it was just around us doing it together. That was the main thing, whatever is was, whether it was the physical activity, whether it was eating, whether it was the socialising, it was supporting her.
And did the Middlemore person, or a community nurse kind of person help you change those eating habits? Diet sheets and things?
Oh she gave us.....yes she did, she did, and that was our initial change. We didn't know too much about that stuff, and she gave us a healthy eating plan with options. And that was a bit of a challenge. But it was very informative, it was very basic, the food, and we had to eat all these different types of... it was nice. I thought it would be all flash, but it’s not, it’s just the basics.
Its just become the norm for you and your house?
Yes, its is pretty much the norm. But we do from time to time, not as much though, we'll have fish and chips once a month.
So the whole change of eating habits and physical activity has changed over the last 5 years. We've also just before the end of last year just finished doing a liver flush, which is a 25 day liver flush. And that consisted of just eating... you weren't allowed to eat any processed foods. And it was really just fruit and vegetables, shakes. So that was for 25 days.
And you said you felt amazing afterwards?
It was, it was into day two day three you could feel the changes. You had more energy, it promoted bowel movement every day, and flushed it all out. It was very much of an amazing journey that.
All those toxics gone?
Yes absolutely and that was the purpose of the whole liver flush.
And you were thinking you might do this once a year or something?
Well, when we done it, they say to do it once every six months, but we are going to do it again this year. We are going to do it on a regular basis. Because its amazing yeah.
An amazing change, you know your whole skin changes, everything changes on you. And without too much physical activity, my wife lost about 8 kilos, and I lost just under 7 kilos, and that was just over a period of 25 days. That was very, very amazing.
I know that your hoa rangatira is on medication, in the blister packs, but I also think you might have saw the benefits or rongoā in terms of kawakawa?
Yes, yes.
So tell us about that. How does that fit in with you wife's regime?
We used to have the tohunga in our community, and she services a lot of our kaumātua and kuia. And she is also a good friend of ours. And it’s quite funny because she tells us about all this rongoā, and she practices it on her own whānau, on her tamariki and mokopuna. And none of her kids or mokopuna have ever had any major major illnesses. And her husband he is a heavy drinker, he works on the railways, he takes it on a regular basis, he takes it every day. Kawakawa and koromiko.
Does she combine them both?
No, but he has the options, so you can do one or the other. And Remi is her name and we heard all the success stories that she was achieving within our own community. So you know we approached her and asked if we took the rongoā, would it impact on the medication because we didn't want that to happen. And she said, no it didn't.
So you know she encouraged them all to keep on taking her medication and at the same time she also offered us the rongoā. And it got to the stage now where it reduced the medication. Absolutely, iIt reduced her medication, and the benefits started to come through. So it was a huge, huge....it was a positive impact on her well being.
And the GP knows that she is drinking the juice of kawakawa or koromiko?
I'm not sure, I don't think so, I don't think so. She also worked with a PHO, she's a registered nurse in Pukekohe as well, so she knew, and we asked her about it, and she said “oh no, this rongoā shouldn't impact on it”. So she didn't tell the doctor or anything like that. But she just went ahead and done it on her advice, because she works in hauora as well and she's a nurse, so we took her advice and it worked.
So how often are you taking the juice?
Every day, you just have a little glass every day. So she would make bottles of rongoā up for us and drop it off at our house And then you just take it once every day.
If you were to talking to someone who is going to be placed in the same situation as you, helping their partner through an illness that was going to be with them forever. And doing that in a whānau situation, what advice might you give to them?
Well, I'm not quite sure, I'd probably say if you've got a good strong relationship and you want that to last it’s about the continuation of the whānau unit, and also around supporting. Supporting each other and helping each other, because there is just no way that my wife could have done it by herself. So, I'd just say just go ahead and do it. You need to do it for your whānau, tamariki, mokopuna. Whānau reasons.
So, I just mihi to you and your wife, Milly, Robert, you've obviously got a fabulous relationship, why you've been prepared to walk this walk with her. As Hone said, walk the walk, not just the talk. But you've been there, hands on, helping her.
Well one of the things that we really tried, and we worked very hard at it, my wife and our kōtiro, is that concept of te whare tapa whā. And that’s very, very hard to do because you've got to have a really good balance. But we have, you get that balance going and you just can't beat it. And if one thing is out, you know its tips the boat.
You're out of kilter?
Absolutely, and so we work very hard and you know its also what I've found by staying to that concept, because I do a lot of travelling in my mahi. And if my whānau unit at home isn’t complete, using those concepts, you know I can't go out there and do my work. Nor can she and nor can my kōtiro, so its something that we work very hard on, it’s not something that is just going to happen, or you just hope it happens, you've have to work constantly at it.
So if that wairua is out of kilter, you just really can't function properly?
You can't, you know you you've got the wairua and you’ve got the whānau, hinengaro and...
And the tinana, its all got to be working together?
So you've got a nice good balance and like you say if it doesn't happen and I've experienced that, and it doesn't always happen. We do get out kilter out from time to time, and we sit down as a whānau and talk about it, and say what's happening. So we have a kōrero around that.
So your daughter is very lucky isn't she, because she's heard you and Milly talk about these kinds of things, this holistic approach to hauora, so she is able to take all of that learning on board and with this new generation she is going forward?
Absolutely. One of the biggest things I love about meeting with my kōtiro and her friends, she's 19 and she give me a big hug, and a big kiss in front of all her friends. Yeah not many 19 year olds do that, or call me daddy. But you know that is just something that I'm very fortunate to have.